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Blog Newspaper...
...By Dr. Howdy
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Thursday
We've Moved!!!
.
In fact, we've moved to a new blog -
click on either picture for great
humor & thought:O)
click on either picture for great
humor & thought:O)
Wednesday
An Arrest Made
.
The police recently busted a man selling
' secret formula' tablets he claimed gave
eternal youth. When going through their
files they noticed it was the fifth time he
was caught for commiting this same
criminal medical fraud.
He had earlier been arrested in 1794,
1856, 1928 and 1983...........
The police recently busted a man selling
' secret formula' tablets he claimed gave
eternal youth. When going through their
files they noticed it was the fifth time he
was caught for commiting this same
criminal medical fraud.
He had earlier been arrested in 1794,
1856, 1928 and 1983...........
An Insult
No Longer
New UNC Computer
Where's Howdy???
For A Long Time
Wednesday's Riddles
.
1) I always fall,
but I never get hurt.
I can bend over backwards,
but cannot break.
I arrive free of charge
but often leave for a fee.
What am I?
2) The more you take the more you leave behind.
What is it?
3) What is the four digit number,
no zeros, in which the first digit
is five times the last, the second
is four more than the first and three
times the third and the third is two
more than the last and two less than
the first.
4) I know a thousand faces,
and count the tailed heads,
feasting bright upon the eyes,
of many who have died.
wielding well a mighty power,
who hath but humble stature.
Masses fall upon their knees,
to scare behold my only side!
5) Can you decipher this famous saying?
That prudent avis which matutinally
deserts the coziness of its abode will
ensnare a vermiculate creature.
6) What has one leg,
but not two.
Never gets fat,
has 15 teeth,
but doesn't chew.
All green and no blue,
bugs don't like them but I do.
What are they?
7) Without a bridle, or a saddle,
across a thing I ride a-straddle.
And those I ride, by help of me,
though almost blind, are made to see.
What am I?
*Answers are located in "comments"
for your convenience & felicity.
1) I always fall,
but I never get hurt.
I can bend over backwards,
but cannot break.
I arrive free of charge
but often leave for a fee.
What am I?
2) The more you take the more you leave behind.
What is it?
3) What is the four digit number,
no zeros, in which the first digit
is five times the last, the second
is four more than the first and three
times the third and the third is two
more than the last and two less than
the first.
4) I know a thousand faces,
and count the tailed heads,
feasting bright upon the eyes,
of many who have died.
wielding well a mighty power,
who hath but humble stature.
Masses fall upon their knees,
to scare behold my only side!
5) Can you decipher this famous saying?
That prudent avis which matutinally
deserts the coziness of its abode will
ensnare a vermiculate creature.
6) What has one leg,
but not two.
Never gets fat,
has 15 teeth,
but doesn't chew.
All green and no blue,
bugs don't like them but I do.
What are they?
7) Without a bridle, or a saddle,
across a thing I ride a-straddle.
And those I ride, by help of me,
though almost blind, are made to see.
What am I?
*Answers are located in "comments"
for your convenience & felicity.
THE DE-SEXING OF AMERICA
.
Men and women are different. There's no
getting around that fact. But when we try
to avoid it, and try we do, the outcome is
downright comical...
MORE!!!
Men and women are different. There's no
getting around that fact. But when we try
to avoid it, and try we do, the outcome is
downright comical...
MORE!!!
Professor Howdy -
(As A Child)
Children Who Expect Too Much
.
My friend, Bill, was talking to me about his son's expectations.
He called them "microwave expectations." Bill was in his early
50s, and his son Ken had been married for about a year, and
his son wanted everything fast - like in a microwave. Bill said,
"I can't believe it. They want all this stuff immediately! They've
been married one year and they want a home, they want furniture,
and they want a new car. They want in a year what it took us
20 years to get!" That's not unusual - the child expects more
than the father had...
MORE!!!
LISTEN!!!
My friend, Bill, was talking to me about his son's expectations.
He called them "microwave expectations." Bill was in his early
50s, and his son Ken had been married for about a year, and
his son wanted everything fast - like in a microwave. Bill said,
"I can't believe it. They want all this stuff immediately! They've
been married one year and they want a home, they want furniture,
and they want a new car. They want in a year what it took us
20 years to get!" That's not unusual - the child expects more
than the father had...
MORE!!!
LISTEN!!!
Christmas Moment
.
If you've lived long enough, odds are you've been
smooched against your will at Christmastime -
thanks to mistletoe. Mistletoe actually became
a big deal centuries ago when ancient people
noticed that even when everything around it
was dead or dying, it still blossomed and thrived.
*Please see "comments" for
additional pertinent information.
If you've lived long enough, odds are you've been
smooched against your will at Christmastime -
thanks to mistletoe. Mistletoe actually became
a big deal centuries ago when ancient people
noticed that even when everything around it
was dead or dying, it still blossomed and thrived.
*Please see "comments" for
additional pertinent information.
Images
.
Malcolm Muggeridge is remembered as one of the most
notable figures of the twentieth century. The wit and
style of this self-dubbed "fatally fluent" journalist made
him as endearing as he was controversial. His presence
was a decipherable entity in print, over the radio, and
on television. With over fifty years in the public eye,
Muggeridge knew well the effect of publicity on the
human ego. In the words of one biographer, he knew
well the strange metamorphosis that turns an individual
into an image...
MORE!!!
Malcolm Muggeridge is remembered as one of the most
notable figures of the twentieth century. The wit and
style of this self-dubbed "fatally fluent" journalist made
him as endearing as he was controversial. His presence
was a decipherable entity in print, over the radio, and
on television. With over fifty years in the public eye,
Muggeridge knew well the effect of publicity on the
human ego. In the words of one biographer, he knew
well the strange metamorphosis that turns an individual
into an image...
MORE!!!
Tuesday
Merry Christmas Quiz
.
Want to test your Christmas knowledge?
Here is a quiz to test your knowledge of
Christmas traditions, popular culture,
the Bible, and other aspects of the holiday
with these simple questions. So put on
your thinking cap and take a tour. Enjoy
yourself! Quiz your friends!
1. In The Night Before Christmas I sprang from my bed to see what?
2. In the song "Grandma Got Run over by a Reindeer" what did
Grandma go to get?
3. What was the first gift my true love sent on the sixth day of
Christmas?
4. In what city did Miracle on 34th Street take place?
5. In It's a Wonderful Life, how did Clarence cleverly save
George's life?
6. Who kept time with the Little Drummer Boy?
7. In The Night Before Christmas, where were the stockings hung?
8. What is the name of the little girl in most versions of The
Nutcracker?
9. What is the last ghost called in A Christmas Carol?
10. What color is the Grinch?
*Answers are located in "comments"
for your convenience & felicity.
Want to test your Christmas knowledge?
Here is a quiz to test your knowledge of
Christmas traditions, popular culture,
the Bible, and other aspects of the holiday
with these simple questions. So put on
your thinking cap and take a tour. Enjoy
yourself! Quiz your friends!
1. In The Night Before Christmas I sprang from my bed to see what?
2. In the song "Grandma Got Run over by a Reindeer" what did
Grandma go to get?
3. What was the first gift my true love sent on the sixth day of
Christmas?
4. In what city did Miracle on 34th Street take place?
5. In It's a Wonderful Life, how did Clarence cleverly save
George's life?
6. Who kept time with the Little Drummer Boy?
7. In The Night Before Christmas, where were the stockings hung?
8. What is the name of the little girl in most versions of The
Nutcracker?
9. What is the last ghost called in A Christmas Carol?
10. What color is the Grinch?
*Answers are located in "comments"
for your convenience & felicity.
Howdy At Work (Left)
New Employment
.
I took a part time job as an opinion poll sampler.
On my very first call, I introduced myself, "Hello,
this is a telephone poll."
The man replied, "Yeeeah, and this is a street lamp!"
I took a part time job as an opinion poll sampler.
On my very first call, I introduced myself, "Hello,
this is a telephone poll."
The man replied, "Yeeeah, and this is a street lamp!"
Speed Maniac
Wasn't Me
Early Winter Illusion
Obscure & Unusual Words
.
1) fricative friketiv (adjective)
: made by forcing the breath through a narrow opening
Mid-19th century. From modern Latin fricativus, from
Latin fricare "to rub."
A frictive sound escaped her after she was given CPR to
revive her breathing.
2) nimbus NIM-bus (noun)
: (Fine Arts) A circle, or disk, or any indication of
radiant light around the heads of divinities, saints,
and sovereigns, upon medals, pictures, etc.; a halo.
: A cloud or atmosphere (as of romance or glamour)
that surrounds a person or thing.
: (Meteorology) A rain cloud.
Nimbus is from the Latin nimbus, "a rain cloud, a rain
storm."
"Sometimes when she stood in front of a lamp, the high-
lights on her hair made a nimbus."
--James Morgan, The Distance to the Moon
1) fricative friketiv (adjective)
: made by forcing the breath through a narrow opening
Mid-19th century. From modern Latin fricativus, from
Latin fricare "to rub."
A frictive sound escaped her after she was given CPR to
revive her breathing.
2) nimbus NIM-bus (noun)
: (Fine Arts) A circle, or disk, or any indication of
radiant light around the heads of divinities, saints,
and sovereigns, upon medals, pictures, etc.; a halo.
: A cloud or atmosphere (as of romance or glamour)
that surrounds a person or thing.
: (Meteorology) A rain cloud.
Nimbus is from the Latin nimbus, "a rain cloud, a rain
storm."
"Sometimes when she stood in front of a lamp, the high-
lights on her hair made a nimbus."
--James Morgan, The Distance to the Moon
UNC Prof Rescue
.
The Coast Guard was called out to rescue a small sailboat in
trouble off the North Carolina Coast. The rescue boat called
the foundering vessel on the radio to get the its location:
"What is your position? Repeat, what is your position?"
And the reply came back, "My position? I'm Professor of
English at UNC*."
*Please see "comments" for
additional pertinent information.
The Coast Guard was called out to rescue a small sailboat in
trouble off the North Carolina Coast. The rescue boat called
the foundering vessel on the radio to get the its location:
"What is your position? Repeat, what is your position?"
And the reply came back, "My position? I'm Professor of
English at UNC*."
*Please see "comments" for
additional pertinent information.
Lady Or Birds?
Knowing How It's Going To End
.
Some years ago, my wife and I were at this couples party at church,
and they played a game that is sort of like that old TV show, "Let's
Make a Deal." Everybody brought some "white elephant" gifts -
something you really wanted to get rid of. Of course, all these
castaway gifts were nicely wrapped so no one knew what was
inside. Then one person has to go to the gift pile, pick one, and
they open it. From that point on, each person has a choice: take
one of those unopened treasures, or give one of those unopened
gifts in exchange for something that's already been opened -
something that you know you want. Now, at this particular party,
there was one particular object - this hand-carved lamp stand -
that everybody wanted. It was one of the few things of value.
And it didn't matter what lengths a person went to in order
to conceal that lamp stand, the next trader inevitably would
remember where it was and they'd go for it. Actually, the dealing
got very animated, and in fact, almost dangerous at times. Every -
body was up for grabs, except for one person - the woman who
had opened the first gift. See, she remembered the rules of the
game - that since the first person didn't get to make a trade,
they get to make the last trade of the game. Through all the
turmoil, she knew who was going home with that lamp stand!
MORE!!!
Some years ago, my wife and I were at this couples party at church,
and they played a game that is sort of like that old TV show, "Let's
Make a Deal." Everybody brought some "white elephant" gifts -
something you really wanted to get rid of. Of course, all these
castaway gifts were nicely wrapped so no one knew what was
inside. Then one person has to go to the gift pile, pick one, and
they open it. From that point on, each person has a choice: take
one of those unopened treasures, or give one of those unopened
gifts in exchange for something that's already been opened -
something that you know you want. Now, at this particular party,
there was one particular object - this hand-carved lamp stand -
that everybody wanted. It was one of the few things of value.
And it didn't matter what lengths a person went to in order
to conceal that lamp stand, the next trader inevitably would
remember where it was and they'd go for it. Actually, the dealing
got very animated, and in fact, almost dangerous at times. Every -
body was up for grabs, except for one person - the woman who
had opened the first gift. See, she remembered the rules of the
game - that since the first person didn't get to make a trade,
they get to make the last trade of the game. Through all the
turmoil, she knew who was going home with that lamp stand!
MORE!!!
Questioning Gabriel
.
The Gospel of Luke begins with two monumental appointments
between time and eternity. A messenger of the Lord appears
first to an aging man in the midst of his priestly duties, and later
to a young, peasant girl in the midst of anticipating the life ahead
of her. In each visit, like a gust of wind that turns an umbrella
inside out, the message delivered was the sort of news that moves
the lives of all who go near it, let alone the worlds of those who heard
it first. Both visits incite fear. Both invoke questions. But in the inter -
change of the eternal and the temporal, though the promises of God
are similarly moving, we find two very different human responses.
MORE!!!
The Gospel of Luke begins with two monumental appointments
between time and eternity. A messenger of the Lord appears
first to an aging man in the midst of his priestly duties, and later
to a young, peasant girl in the midst of anticipating the life ahead
of her. In each visit, like a gust of wind that turns an umbrella
inside out, the message delivered was the sort of news that moves
the lives of all who go near it, let alone the worlds of those who heard
it first. Both visits incite fear. Both invoke questions. But in the inter -
change of the eternal and the temporal, though the promises of God
are similarly moving, we find two very different human responses.
MORE!!!
Prof. Howdy On Left -
At An Early Age
Monday
Merry Christmas Quiz
.
1. How many reindeer does Santa Have?
2. In Frosty the Snowman, who brought Frosty back to life?
3. Who lost $8,000 in It's a Wonderful Life?
4. In How the Grinch Stole Christmas, what biological
shortcoming made the Grinch so mean?
5. Who tells you she's in town by tap, tap, tappin' at your
windowpane?
6. What is the biggest selling Christmas single of all time?
7. What was Scrooge's first name?
8. What was the name of Rudolph's dogsled driving friend?
9. Who said "God Bless Us, Every One!"?
10. What carol contains the line "O tidings of comfort and joy"?
*Answers are located in "comments"
for your convenience & felicity.
Want to test your Christmas knowledge?
Here is a quiz to test your knowledge of
Christmas traditions, popular culture,
the Bible, and other aspects of the holiday
with these simple questions. So put on
your thinking cap and take a tour. Enjoy
yourself! Quiz your friends!
Here is a quiz to test your knowledge of
Christmas traditions, popular culture,
the Bible, and other aspects of the holiday
with these simple questions. So put on
your thinking cap and take a tour. Enjoy
yourself! Quiz your friends!
1. How many reindeer does Santa Have?
2. In Frosty the Snowman, who brought Frosty back to life?
3. Who lost $8,000 in It's a Wonderful Life?
4. In How the Grinch Stole Christmas, what biological
shortcoming made the Grinch so mean?
5. Who tells you she's in town by tap, tap, tappin' at your
windowpane?
6. What is the biggest selling Christmas single of all time?
7. What was Scrooge's first name?
8. What was the name of Rudolph's dogsled driving friend?
9. Who said "God Bless Us, Every One!"?
10. What carol contains the line "O tidings of comfort and joy"?
*Answers are located in "comments"
for your convenience & felicity.
New UNC Bride
.
Montague came home to his noble estate,
only to find his new bride sobbing at the bar.
"Penelope, what's wrong?" he asked, wiping
the tears from her eyes, gently.
"Oh, Montague darling, I wanted to surprise
you with a nice martini when you came in the
door," she gulped. "I started out by rinsing
the ice cubes in hot water, and now I can't
find them..."
Montague came home to his noble estate,
only to find his new bride sobbing at the bar.
"Penelope, what's wrong?" he asked, wiping
the tears from her eyes, gently.
"Oh, Montague darling, I wanted to surprise
you with a nice martini when you came in the
door," she gulped. "I started out by rinsing
the ice cubes in hot water, and now I can't
find them..."
UNC Hunting
.
The Game Warden stopped a UNC* grad deer hunter
and asked to see his hunting license.
"This is last year's license," the warden informed him.
"I know," said the UNC grad, "but I shouldn't need a new
license, I am only shooting at the deer I missed last year."
*Please see "comments" for
additional pertinent information.
The Game Warden stopped a UNC* grad deer hunter
and asked to see his hunting license.
"This is last year's license," the warden informed him.
"I know," said the UNC grad, "but I shouldn't need a new
license, I am only shooting at the deer I missed last year."
*Please see "comments" for
additional pertinent information.
UNC Co-Ed Skiing Class
Pop Quiz
.
Choose the word that best completes the meaning of
the sentence. The answers are listed below - no cheating!
1. The three-year-old was _______ in his refusal to taste
the broccoli.
a. recondite
b. didactic
c. fortuitous
d. resolute
e. genteel
2. We _______ the fine print in the document but were
unable to find the clause the lawyer had mentioned.
a. scrutinized
b. reconciled
c. exculpated
d. cajoled
e. accrued
3. A state in which one can see, hear, feel, smell, and
taste little or nothing is known as _______ deprivation.
a. aggregate
b. subversive
c. sensory
d. sensual
e. sensuous
4. The children tried to be _______ about the fact that
their parents couldn't afford to give them Christmas pres-
ents, but you could tell that they were really quite
depressed inside.
a. tangential
b. abysmal
c. stoic
d. disingenuous
e. eclectic
5. We felt repeatedly _______ by the impersonal and inflex-
ible bureaucracy in our attempt to win an exemption to the
rule.
a. vindicated
b. stymied
c. deluged
d. reiterated
e. gesticulated
*Answers are located in "comments"
for your convenience & felicity.
Choose the word that best completes the meaning of
the sentence. The answers are listed below - no cheating!
1. The three-year-old was _______ in his refusal to taste
the broccoli.
a. recondite
b. didactic
c. fortuitous
d. resolute
e. genteel
2. We _______ the fine print in the document but were
unable to find the clause the lawyer had mentioned.
a. scrutinized
b. reconciled
c. exculpated
d. cajoled
e. accrued
3. A state in which one can see, hear, feel, smell, and
taste little or nothing is known as _______ deprivation.
a. aggregate
b. subversive
c. sensory
d. sensual
e. sensuous
4. The children tried to be _______ about the fact that
their parents couldn't afford to give them Christmas pres-
ents, but you could tell that they were really quite
depressed inside.
a. tangential
b. abysmal
c. stoic
d. disingenuous
e. eclectic
5. We felt repeatedly _______ by the impersonal and inflex-
ible bureaucracy in our attempt to win an exemption to the
rule.
a. vindicated
b. stymied
c. deluged
d. reiterated
e. gesticulated
*Answers are located in "comments"
for your convenience & felicity.
Word Match Game
.
Match the words in the left-hand column
with the correct definition in the right-hand
column. The answers are located in "comments".
1. deign ............... A. A strong, offensive smell
2. malarkey ........ B. An act or instance of depriving
3. privation ......... C. A humorous person
4. grabble ........... D. Nonsense or rubbish
5. fetor ................ E. The interval between two reigns
6. oblation ........... F. A hermit
7. interregnum ... G. To scratch or search around with the hands
8. dreg ................ H. To think worthy
9. wag .................. I. The act of offering something
10. eremite ......... J. A small amount
Match the words in the left-hand column
with the correct definition in the right-hand
column. The answers are located in "comments".
1. deign ............... A. A strong, offensive smell
2. malarkey ........ B. An act or instance of depriving
3. privation ......... C. A humorous person
4. grabble ........... D. Nonsense or rubbish
5. fetor ................ E. The interval between two reigns
6. oblation ........... F. A hermit
7. interregnum ... G. To scratch or search around with the hands
8. dreg ................ H. To think worthy
9. wag .................. I. The act of offering something
10. eremite ......... J. A small amount
New Flat Screen TV -
UNC Style
Great Mileage -
one horse power!
.
![[00024712[3].jpg]](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZYUjAymFt4VWEliquLMXKScelhuc8YBivOiE4KDV9qRjserY14H1bNSOjuPNfqDvFoQ404SnWdQtwn1BlPUR-elCOFPkkC53E8xZxQkQ1vzIkPIDHWKgztAZee1yhXGaBz2J6UA/s1600/00024712%5B3%5D.jpg)
..............................................Under development at UNC!!!
..............................................Under development at UNC!!!
Do You Agree???
.
If you disagree - express your thoughts in "comments"
(All comments allowed unless they are not family friendly -
to those of you at UNC - that means no cussing:O)
If you disagree - express your thoughts in "comments"
(All comments allowed unless they are not family friendly -
to those of you at UNC - that means no cussing:O)
Debt-Free
.
Our friend, Vicki, is one very happy woman. For many years now,
she has carried a heavy load of nagging credit card debt. If you've
ever been in debt for a while, you know how it always weighs you
down like this heavy burden on your back. Well, Vicki recently
came into some money through an inheritance, and you know
what she did with it! She had a party - a check writing party!
All those debts are paid, and you can tell she feels like she just
got out of prison!
MORE!!!
Our friend, Vicki, is one very happy woman. For many years now,
she has carried a heavy load of nagging credit card debt. If you've
ever been in debt for a while, you know how it always weighs you
down like this heavy burden on your back. Well, Vicki recently
came into some money through an inheritance, and you know
what she did with it! She had a party - a check writing party!
All those debts are paid, and you can tell she feels like she just
got out of prison!
MORE!!!
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