This Blog -
Moved To:

Blog Newspaper...
...By Dr. Howdy

Sign-up for E.Mail Updates



New UNC Bride

The image “” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

Montague came home to his noble estate,
only to find his new bride sobbing at the bar.

"Penelope, what's wrong?" he asked, wiping
the tears from her eyes, gently.

"Oh, Montague darling, I wanted to surprise
you with a nice martini when you came in the
door," she gulped. "I started out by rinsing
the ice cubes in hot water, and now I can't
find them..."

Revolt of the rodents

By Dave Barry | Once again, we are forced to ask ourselves, as a society, whether nature should be legal.

Consider a story from the Manchester (N.H.) Union Leader, written by Paul Tracy and sent in by alert reader Arnie Alpert. This story states that a Laconia, N.H., police officer was called to the municipal water-treatment facility in response to — and as you read this column, please bear in mind that I am not making any of these newspaper quotations up — "a report of a suspicious-acting woodchuck that would not let people out of the building." The officer sized up the situation and, according to the story, "determined that the animal needed to be euthanized and tried to run it over with his cruiser." So far, so good. Law-enforcement experts will tell you, after they've had a few belts, that in a situation where a member of the marmot family is holding people hostage in a sewage plant, the textbook response is to drive a police car over the alleged perpetrator, then, if necessary, advise it of its rights.

Unfortunately, things did not go exactly according to plan. The story quotes a plant employee as saying, "When he got out after running over it, I think he thought it was dead; then the thing sprung up and attacked him."

At this point, the officer — and if you have never been attacked by a woodchuck, then do not second-guess this decision — pulled his 9 mm revolver and commenced firing.

"We think he emptied a clip," a plant employee is quoted as saying, "but we could only find eight casings on the pavement."

The story states that during the battle, the officer, seeking to escape the woodchuck, "jumped up on the cruiser and injured his knee." Fortunately, before anybody else could be hurt, the woodchuck went to that Big Burrow in the Sky.

I wish I could tell you that this was an isolated incident. I wish I could look you in the eyeball and say, "This was just one lone disgruntled woodchuck, possibly a former postal employee, who fortunately will never again terrorize humanity, thanks to a quick-acting police officer, who, fortunately, was not carrying nuclear weapons."

But I cannot say that. For one thing, I lack the lung capacity. For another thing, I have here an article from the Gaithersburg (Md.) Gazette, written by April E. Fulton and sent in by several alert readers, which states, "Nine residents of the South Village area of Montgomery Village — two adults and seven children — were playing near Docena Court on the morning of June 15 when they suddenly were charged by a band of about a dozen squirrels."

The article quotes one of the women — who was bitten on the foot — as saying: "We were just playing in the yard, like we do every day, and suddenly, out of nowhere, about 12 squirrels started charging us, making these high-pitched, shrill noises." A neighbor is quoted as saying: "The squirrels that day went crazy." The article states that on June 21, a representative of the Maryland Department of Natural Resources inspected the area and "found no abnormal behavior from the squirrels."

Of course not. They may be squirrels, but they are not stupid. They're not about to go after a government official, not after what happened to the woodchuck. No, they put on a cute little Walt Disney show for the Maryland Department of Natural Resources, squeaking and scampering around with acorns in their cheeks. But you may rest assured that as soon as the coast was clear, they resumed smoking tiny cigarettes and planning their next attack. They will stop at nothing, as we can see from the following headline from a Sept. 2, 1994 front-page article in the Missoula Missoulian, written by Michael Downs and sent in by many alert readers: FLAMING SQUIRRELS IGNITE FIRE

The story states that "two electrocuted squirrels fell from a power line Thursday morning, their flaming bodies igniting a small grass fire near Tarkio." A fire official is quoted as saying that it could have been a male and a female squirrel engaged in an act of "burning rodent passion." (The fire official does not point out that both "Rodent Passion" and "Flaming Squirrels" would be excellent names for rock bands; this was probably just an oversight.)

At this point, you're saying: "Dave, you have presented ample journalistic evidence here to prove that the animal kingdom is attempting, for whatever reason, to wipe out the entire human race. But at least members of the news media are safe!"

I wish I could agree, but, tragically, I cannot — not in light of a recent Associated Press item from Kennewick, Wash., sent in by several alert readers, which begins: "A TV reporter's hair gel apparently attracted a swarm of bees that stung him more than 30 times yesterday." The reporter was doing a story about beekeeping when the attack occurred; the story states that the beekeeper, in an effort to help, covered the reporter's head with a protective hood, but unfortunately, the hood "also turned out to contain bees."

I am sure that you, as a person concerned about the First Amendment, have the same reaction to this story as I did, namely: How come this never happens, on-camera, to my local TV reporters? Until we get solid answers to this and many other questions raised by this column, I am urging everyone to avoid all contact with nature in any form, including vegetables. Speaking of which, you should also write your congressperson.
  .comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}
The fellow who's busy pulling on the
oars hasn't got time to rock the boat.


"How to Be Sure You're
a REAL Christian"
1-888-NEED-HIM (24/7 - free call)


Two teams of workmen were assigned to dig holes and
put in new telephone poles. One group checked in at end
of day and when asked how many poles they had put in,
they said 12. The second team checked in later, with a
UNC grad as foreman. When asked how many poles they
had put in he said 3. The boss said "Only 3? The other
group put in 12." To which the UNC grad replied, "Yes,
but you should see how much of the pole they left sticking
out of the ground."


Before the mountains were born or You brought forth the earth
and the world, from everlasting to everlasting You are God.
For a thousand years in Your sight are like a day that has just
gone by, or like a watch in the night. --Psalm 90
  .comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}
The fellow who's busy pulling on the
oars hasn't got time to rock the boat.


"How to Be Sure You're
a REAL Christian"
1-888-NEED-HIM (24/7 - free call)


Two teams of workmen were assigned to dig holes and
put in new telephone poles. One group checked in at end
of day and when asked how many poles they had put in,
they said 12. The second team checked in later, with a
UNC grad as foreman. When asked how many poles they
had put in he said 3. The boss said "Only 3? The other
group put in 12." To which the UNC grad replied, "Yes,
but you should see how much of the pole they left sticking
out of the ground."


Before the mountains were born or You brought forth the earth
and the world, from everlasting to everlasting You are God.
For a thousand years in Your sight are like a day that has just
gone by, or like a watch in the night. --Psalm 90
  .comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}
Thanks for stopping by and checking out my blog, and the kind words. I enjoyed th humour on your site. Merry Christmas
  .comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}
Post a Comment

<< Home

* * * Great Archives Here - - - - "Music That Howdy Enjoys" Below * * * * * * * * * * * * For God loves YOU so very much that He gave His only Son so that if YOU believe in Him you will not perish but will live with Him forever!!!

Enter your E-mail

Powered by FeedBlitz

* * * Great Archives Here - - - - "Music That Howdy Enjoys" Below * * *

February 2006   March 2006   April 2006   May 2006   June 2006   July 2006   August 2006   September 2006   October 2006   November 2006   December 2006   December 2007  

How Can I Know God???

Tales of Narnia

Answering Islam

The Da Vinci Code

A Short Look At Six World Religions

Bible - God's Word in different languages...

My Heart Christ's Home

Big John's America

Not Garbage

Discovery Institute

See The Word

Bible Study Info

Don't Be Left Behind

For The University Students & Faculty

How to become a Christian

The Berean Call

Great For Kids

Stories For Kids

Promoting Your Own Blog

Looking For God

Bible Knowledge Challenge

The Young Earth Club

Who Is Jesus???

Christian Apologetics

Christian Web Info

Great Christians In History

History of American Christianity

Bible Instructions


Dr. Ben Haden

Bible Search Tools

Kids For Truth

Lincoln - A Christian

Mission To America

One Place For Learning

President Lincoln

Purgatory, Heaven Or Hell?

Intellectual Takeout

Evangelical Viewpoint

Dr. John Vernon McGee

Insight For Living

Turning Point

Outstanding Bible Teacher

Dr. Tony Evans

Listen To The Bible

Is Jesus God?


Great Bible Teaching

America - Why I Love Her

How To Become A Christian

*Watch The Jesus Movie*


Your very own library

Muhammad or Jesus???

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 1

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 2

Christian Women

Politics & Religion

Is Jesus God?

Statement Of What Howdy Believes!!!

Bible Crosswords

Los Angeles

Bible Search Tool

Great Bible Teacher

All About Cults

Religion Comparison

The Relationship of the Church to Israel

Just For Guys

Church History

***Watch The Jesus Movie***
{Many Languages}

Howdy's Blog #2

Howdy's Blog #3

Music That Howdy Enjoys

Military Music

Blueberry Hill

Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring


A Taste Of Honey - clip

(I Left My Heart) In San Francisco - clip

Take The 'A' Train - clip

Hello, Dolly! - clip

Peggy Sue - clip

Theme From Peter Gunn - clip

Song from Moulin Rouge


Ebb Tide

Tara's Theme from Gone with the Wind

Around the World in 80 Days

Breakfast at Tiffany's


The Way We Were

You Do Something to Me



A Foggy Day



Arrivederci Roma

Theme from Moulin Rouge II

Stardust - Big Band



Rhapsody in Blue

Sleepy Lagoon

My Foolish Heart

Lisbon Antigua

La Mer

April in Portugal

Because of You

Poor People of Paris

Unchained Melody

Stranger on the Shore


Maple Leaf Rag

Voices of Spring

Radetzky March

Water Music (Excerpt) George Frideric Handel

Finale - William Tell Overture

Overture - My Fair Lady

The Rain in Spain

The Lonely Bull - Herb Alpert

Tijuana Taxi - Herb Alpert

The Happy Whistler

So Rare

Mona Lisa

Ghost Riders in the Sky

Walk, Don't Run

Wonderland by Night

Canadian Sunset

Blue Tango

The Happy Wanderer

Down Yonder

Midnight in Moscow

Crazy Medley


That's for Me

Quiet Village

Harbor Lights

Dueling Banjoes II

Autumn Leaves

My Foolish Heart

Don't Know Much





Close To You

Rainy Days & Mondays

Sing A Song

Yesterday Once More

We've Only Just Begun

Goodbye To Love

Only You

As Time Goes By

As Time Goes By II

As Time Goes By - Original

After Loving

San Francisco

Stranger In Paradise

Mrs. Howdy

Rags To Riches

The Good Life

Hello Dolly

All Of Me

Thank Heaven For Little Girls

Beyond The Sea

Everybody Loves

Return To Me

That's Amore

Autumn Leaves

Love Me With All Your Heart

If I Give My Heart To You

Autumn Leaves II

Autumn Leaves III

See The USA

My Prayer

You Always Hurt

Take Me Out To The Ballgame

Love Me Tender

Its Now Or Never

Old Shep

Dont Be Cruel

When I Fall In Love

When I Fall In Love II

When I Fall In Love III

A Fool Such As I

You'll Never Know


I'm Yours

Wish You Were Here

Lady Of Spain


It's Magic

Secret Love

This Magic Moment

My Prayer

Twilight Time

Great Pretender

Harbor Lights

Little Darlin'


No Other Love

Magic Moments

Till The End Of Time

Dont Let The Stars

Overture - Barber of Seville

Back In The Saddle

You Always Hurt

When I Fall

When A Man

True Love



In The Mood

A Taste Of Honey

The Lonely Bull

Lollipops And Roses

This Guys In Love With You

What Now My Love

Three Coins In The Fountain

You've Gotta Have Heart


Stranger In Paradise II

Love Is...


Georgia On My Mind

Sentimental Over You

Thanks For The Memories

Too Young


Never On Sunday

Yellow Rose Of Texas


My Little Corner

Speak Low

Moments To Remember


Be My Love

Embassy Waltz


A Certain Smile

Chances Are

Not For Me To Say

Stranger On The Shore

I'll Be Seeing You

Cherry Pink


Moonlight Serenade

Last Date

Naughty Lady

Til I Kissed You

All I Have To Do Is Dream

Dixie Land Band

Ghost Riders In The Sky

The Happy Wanderer


Santa Catalina

Band Of Gold

Auld Lang Syne

The Wayward Wind

P.S. I Love You

Harbor Lights

Ebb Tide

Lime Light

Green Door

My Heart Cries

Down Yonder

Silvana Mangano Anna

Does Your Chewing Gum?

Grand Night For Singing

Purple People Eater

Orange Blossom Special

I'll Get By

'Til Then

Katie At UNC

Love Letters

As Time Goes By

Cheek To Cheek

Mission Impossible

The Way You Look Tonight


Glad To Be An American

Battle Hymn Of The Republic

How Great Thou Art

Have Thine Own Way

Beyond The Sunset

Amazing Grace

He's Got The Whole World

Peace In The Valley

How Great Thou Art II

Stars & Stripes Forever

Tennessee Waltz

Beverly Hillbillies Theme

El Paso

Happy Trails

Big John

Sixteen Tons

Which Doctor?

Wonderful! Wonderful!




Daniel Boone

Davy Crockett

Dick VanDyke

Donna Reed

Father Knows Best


Gomer Pile


Have Gun

Hawaii Five-O

Hogans Heroes







Law & Order

Lone Ranger

Magnificent 7


Man From Uncle




Mission I

Mr. Ed

My 3 Sons

Raw Hide

Real McCoys

Rifle Man

Secret Agent

Simon & Simon




Super Man














Victory I


The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Mr. Sandman

Only The Lonely

Beyond The Sea


Magnificent 7

Magnificent 7 - II


I Walk The Line

God loves you so much that He died for you!!!


Click Here

Verse of the Day

* * * Four Important Things To KNOW: #1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned & fall short of the glory of God. #2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ (God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of Peace & Savior of the World). #3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone, anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in, relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven). #4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE. No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic, Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist, Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives) to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through) ME (no other name). *** This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - - (Rev. 3:20) {Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian - however they are great afterwards!!!} *** Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment), and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness, forever with God), and only a few find it.

Firefox 2
'Thought & Humor' viewed
best with Firefox:

But these are written so that you may
believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the
Son of God, and that by believing in
Him you will have life. Jn 20:31

Seek the Lord while He may be found;
call on Him while He is near. Let the
wicked forsake his way and the evil
man his thoughts. Let him turn to the
Lord, and He will have mercy on him,
and to our God, for He will freely
pardon. "For My thoughts are not
your thoughts, neither are your ways
My ways," declares the Lord. "As the
heavens are higher than the earth, so
are My ways higher than your ways
and My thoughts than your thoughts.
As the rain and the snow come down
from heaven, and do not return to it
without watering the earth and making
it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed
for the sower and bread for the eater,
so is My word that goes out from My
mouth: It will not return to Me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire and
achieve the purpose for which I sent it.
You will go out in joy and be led forth
in peace; the mountains and hills will
burst into song before you, and all the
trees of the field will clap their hands.
Instead of the thornbush will grow the
pine tree, and instead of briers the myrtle
will grow. This will be for the Lord's
renown, for an everlasting sign, which
will not be destroyed." Is 55

O Lord, you have searched me and you
know me. You know when I sit and when
I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying
down; you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue you know
it completely, O Lord. You hem me in -
behind and before; you have laid your
hand upon me. Such knowledge is too
wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where
can I flee from your presence? If I go up
to the heavens, you are there; if I make
my bed in the depths, you are there.

If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide
me and the light become night around
me," even the darkness will not be dark
to you; the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you. For you
created my inmost being; you knit me
together in my mother's womb. I praise
you because I am fearfully and wonderfully
made; your works are wonderful, I know
that full well. My frame was not hidden
from you when I was made in the secret
place. When I was woven together in the
depths of the earth, your eyes saw my
unformed body. All the days ordained
for me were written in your book before
one of them came to be.

How precious to me are your thoughts,
O God! How vast is the sum of them!
Were I to count them, they would
outnumber the grains of sand. When
I awake, I am still with you. Search me,
O God, and know my heart; test me
and know my anxious thoughts. See
if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Ps 139

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16

When I survey the wondrous cross
On which the Prince of Glory died,
My richest gain I count but loss,
And pour contempt on all my pride.

Were the whole realm of nature mine,
That were a present far too small:
Love so amazing, so divine,
Demands my soul, my life, my all.
- - Isaac Watts

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?