. A UNC student goes into a restaurant and notices there's a "peel and win" sticker on her coffee cup. So she's peels it off and starts screaming, "I've won a motor home! I've won a motor home!"
The waitress says, "That's impossible. The biggest prize is a free lunch." But the student keeps screaming, "I've won a motor home! I've won a motor home!"
Finally the manager comes over and says, "Ma'am, I'm sorry, but you're mistaken. You couldn't possibly have won a motor home because we didn't have that as a prize!" The student says, "No it's not a mistake. I've won a motor home!" She hands the ticket to the manager and he reads... " W I N A B A G E L "
Comment & Forward>>>
Going to the doctor is never fun. You have to wriggle out of work and book weeks in advance (even though you're sick today), plus it costs a lot of money. It's worse when you're new to an area and don't know anyone.
Should you press your luck and go through the Yellow Pages?
You might want to check with the American Medical Association first. Enter your city, state and ZIP code and the type of doctor you need. You'll find a listing of doctors in your area, their educational backgrounds, phone numbers and other pertinent information.
Now that Congress has changed: Teacher Arrested Jan 31, 2007
At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, Senator Ted Kennedy said he believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
"Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," Kennedy said. "They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'there are 3 sides to every triangle'."
When asked to comment on the arrest, Senator Clinton said, "If Heaven had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, we would have given us more fingers and toes."
I'm often not proud of my home state--Minnesota. It's a great place to live seven months out of the year, but the other five, you hibernate or become a "snow bird" heading south for the winter. Nobody plans vacations trips to Minnesota in January because our wind chills can reach -40 degrees below zero. But the recent elections took the prize in Minnesota lunacy.
On November 7, Minnesota became the first state to send a Muslim to Congress. His name is Keith Ellison, a former Catholic who converted to Islam at age 19. While campaigning, he seldom mentioned his faith unless asked about it.
Muslims around the world are celebrating. Even Al-Jazeera gave Ellison's victory front page space. Muslims rightly feel a new sense of acceptance in America after the horrors of 9/11 and the somewhat-justified fear of Muslims that many Americans have of them.
There are some huge concerns, nonetheless. On my radio program last weekend I played a clip of Ellison's acceptance speech. The crowd began shouting "Allah Akbar," meaning "God is greater," which is often spoken during acts of Islamic violence. I am not suggesting Ellison is violent and certainly not suggesting he is a jihadist; however, to hear these words in the usual defiant voice was disturbing.
However, Ellison had ties to Louis Farrakhan's "Nation of Islam." Why has this been played down? His Republican opponent, Alan Fine, was concerned about these past ties though Ellison tried to deny them. But when Ellison denounced Farrakhan, he even got some Jewish votes in this raging blue state of Minnesota.
Ellison will be sworn in on a Koran. So now the Bible is equivalent to the Koran in the halls of Congress? Doesn't this then mean he is pledging allegiance to Islamic Law (Sharia) rather than our Constitution? Where is the outrage here? He will also bring his prayer mat and pray to Mecca. Ellison is a Sunni Muslim.
His biggest ally is CAIR: The Council on American-Islamic Relations." Avi Lipkin is one of the world's top terror experts. On the DVD I made with Avi in August (available at the Web site under "Our Products") Lipkin states the purpose of CAIR is to make Islam look good and to cover up all negative angles. If you visit CAIR's Web site, it will appear that they stand with America, stand against radical Islam, and are good American citizens. I believe some ARE good American citizens and that some Muslims aren't speaking out due to fear.
A Web site coming out of Dubai stated, "God willing in the next election, half of Congress will be from the rational Muslims." Another wrote, "May God make this the beginning of victory for Muslims on the very ground of the despots."
I sincerely pray we can trust Mr. Ellison with some of America's top secrets and in our war on terror, more appropriately called our war with radical Islam. I pray he will put America first and Islam second, but that is not the nature of anyone who has a devout faith, Christians included.
He says he's here to "put love in the world." I hope he shows that Americans like me need not worry. And I pray that Muslim youth will look up to him as a leader who loves America and the American people. But I also have to pray this is NOT the beginning of a trend where Islam makes more and more inroads into America by means other than the sword.
I want to trust Keith Ellison, but there is something within me that tells me that is risky. We can pray for him, however—that he would have wisdom, sound judgment, and that he would see the errors in his Islamic faith. Who knows who might cross his path and lead him to faith in Jesus Christ.
Must not all things at the last be swallowed up in death?"
Plato (427 BC - 347 BC), Dialogues, Phaedo
So when this corruptible has put on incorruption, and this mortal has put on immortality, then shall be brought to pass the saying that is written:
"Death is swallowed up in victory. O Death, where is your sting? O Hades, where is your victory?" The sting of death is sin, and the strength of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
SRI LANKA New Attacks on Christians - VOM Canada On October 23, a church worker and his family at Vineyard Community Church in Gonawela, Sri Lanka, were attacked by five men claiming to be police officers. According to a November 3rd report from the National Christian Evangelical Alliance of Sri Lanka (NCEAL), the family was guarding the church building when five men approached at approximately midnight. The five men threatened the family, beat the man with clubs and aggressively shook a child. They also stole a woman's gold necklace, damaged the building's electricity supply and smashed pots and vases. The beaten man sustained serious injuries. A week later the church was again attacked, this time by a group of 10 men. They unsuccessfully tried to set the building on fire. No one was injured in this attack. In another attack on October 30, the pastor of Calvary Chapel of Lanka in Polhena was accosted by a group of local men at approximately 9 a.m. Two or three men beat him while the others looked on. He has been hospitalized for arm injuries. Pray God will strengthen all who were attacked and they will be witnesses of Christ's love. Psalm 50:15
ERITREA Christian Singer Freed From Prison - The Chicago Tribune Gospel singer Helen Berhane, who belonged to a banned evangelical church in Eritrea, has been released after more than two years in detention. She was released in late October, according to a statement issued by Amnesty International. Berhane was arrested in May 2004. "She spent most of her detention in inhuman and degrading conditions inside a metal shipping container, which was used as a prison cell,” the statement said. The authorities reportedly tortured her many times to make her recant her faith. Give thanks to God Helen Berhane has been released at last. Ask our merciful Father to heal her mind and body as she continues to be a witness for Christ. Matthew 12:20, 21
INDIA Dalit Christians Forced to Bow to Hindu Idols - Compass Direct Lambini tribal villagers in Karnataka state prohibited Pastor Revanna Naik and his congregation from worshiping on Sunday, October 29, instead forcing them to bow down and worship Hindu deities. Three of the 11 Christian families at the church in the remote village in Chitradurga district refused to bow before the idols or partake of the prasad offering that would indicate allegiance to the Hindu deities. The local council chief ordered the village to ostracize those families. This stigma of being ostracized will crush the very spirit of the Lambani, who are very clan-oriented people. On November 6, Hindu extremists forced Christians in a remote village in southern Karnataka to bow down before Hindu deities. The Christians were marched to the village temple, forced to bow down before the Hindu gods and had the vermilion mark applied to their foreheads. A police inspector only watched this violation of the Christians' rights. Pray the families who are shunned by the villagers will draw close to Jesus and know His loving presence as never before. Pray the police officer and Hindu extremists will repent and come to know Jesus' forgiveness. Matthew 24:32
AUSTRALIA Girl Who Rejected Islam Now Facing False Murder Charges - ASSIST News Australian media reports that on October 9th, 17-year-old Kaihana Hussain was attacked with a knife by her father, Dr Mohammed Hussain, after she reiterated her commitment to convert from Islam to Christianity. According to the reports, Kaihana's mother was fatally stabbed when she tried to intervene, and her father attempted to kill himself after Kaihana escaped the apartment. Police confirmed at the time that Kaihana was not a suspect. Dr Hussain survived, and now alleges that Kaihana stabbed her mother to death and attempted to murder him because they disapproved of her boyfriend. Kaihana was subsequently arrested and faced a court on November 7, where she was charged with murder and attempted murder. She did not speak and no plea was entered. Kaihana Hussain remains in custody until her trial, which has been slated for May 22, 2007. Pray God will reveal the truth in this matter and Kaihana will be set free. Matthew 10:26
There is certainly no question but that as Evangelical Christians we would have preferred a different result than the one produced in last week's election. There has already been, and there will continue to be, a great deal of soul-searching and attempts to understand what went wrong . . . what caused the tremendous back-lash against President Bush and the Republican party. And there will be valiant efforts to sugar-coat the bitter pill which those results delivered to us. But face it: The election results constituted a no-confidence vote against the president, his administration and his political party. It was not a "pro-Democratic" vote -- it was an "anti-Bush, anti-Republican" vote. The Democrats did not win the election; the Republicans lost it. It was not a mandate for the Democrats as much as it was a demand for a nationwide housecleaning -- a reaction against perpetuating the status quo represented by President Bush and the corruption riddled Republican Congress.
The "why" of those results is easy to arrive at. It was expressed by the European historian, Lord Acton, in a letter to Bishop Creichton in England 1887: "Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts absolutely." The quote is a familiar one, but often not noticed is its concluding sentence: "Great men are almost always bad men." The point Lord Acton was trying to make is that a person's sense of morality decreases as his or her power increases.
Last week's nationwide reaction against President Bush's administration and the Republican candidates at just about every level of government demonstrated the truth of Lord Acton's statement. The "political housecleaning" which was the hallmark of the Republican takeover of the government beginning with their 1994 congressional election victories and the two presidential victories by George W. Bush, soon deteriorated into a morass of corruption. American voters disapproved of the president's and the Republican congress' abandonment of traditional conservative positions. The voters registered their disapproval of unlimited spending, unreasonable growth in government, record breaking increases in our national debt, corruption scandals within the Republican leadership . . . and perhaps above all, the mismanaged war in Iraq And although he had at his disposal the veto power to halt some or even most of those abuses, the president let them go unchallenged.
But the American voters have not turned away from the conservative, moral value trends which have been so evident in recent years. For example: In the 8 states which had the constitution amendment in defense of marriage on the ballot, that amendment was adopted in 7 of those states -- only Arizona failed to enact it, becoming the first state where the voters have defeated such an amendment. This continuing conservative trend of American voters brings to nearly 30 the number of states which have adopted -- by vote of the people -- an anti same-sex marriage amendment to their state constitution.
Public opinion polls of just about every type have for years shown that the conservative Evangelical Christian vote has been in favor of the Republican party program and candidates, and by substantial margins. Similar polls now disclose that those margins diminished in this most recent election. Those conservative Christians have not given up their commitment to moral values, but they have lost faith in the way government has operated at all levels, and have lost faith also in business, school and church leaders. A major national poll following the election disclosed that 7 out of 10 voters believe the nation is on the wrong track. And emerging from the results of this election is evidence that Conservatives' commitment to moral values voting has not been abandoned. Although the percentage of Evangelicals voting Republican was down 8 points from the 2004 election, Republicans still received 70% of the Evangelical votes.
But even in the face of this national disillusionment, this is no time for the conservative Evangelical Christians to do as the liberal establishment advised: "stay out of politics." Beginning most notably in the Reagan years, America's Christians have been a significant factor in the nation's elections. The fact that some politicians abused the privilege which political power bestowed upon them does not mean that those conservative Christian goals and ideals were wrong.
Where should we go from here? Civil rights attorney Joe Murray expressed it well: "We are Christians first, Americans second, and Republicans and Democrats a distant third. Our Christian faith erases any man-made labels that the secular world tries to apply to us. Christians need to vote their values, not their party affiliation. Christians should be leading, not following, those in the political process; and this is best done when all Christians return to the solid foundation of biblical truth and use that as a starting point to advance Christian public policy initiatives."
And what is the backdrop against which Murray's admonition should be put into practice? In his new book, "Do as I Say (Not as I Do)," author Peter Schweizer graphically describes the current American scene: "Homosexuality is accepted as simply “an alternative lifestyle.” We murder babies that are socially inconvenient. We change marriage partners like a fashion statement. We have abandoned the sanctity of commitments in our families and in our businesses. Immorality and deceit have come to characterize the highest offices in our land. Our public enterprises have been prostituted to the convenience of the elite. Our mainline media takes pride in forming public opinion rather than informing it. Our culture has disconnected character from destiny. Our entertainments celebrate adultery, fornication, violence, aberrant sexual practices and every imaginable form of evil. We have become the primary exporters of everything that God abhors."
Wow! And this is the nation which was founded on Judeo-Christian principles, and where 80% of its citizens claim to be "Christian," involving every aspect of that terminology.
How should we then live? Readers familiar with Francis Schaeffer, the founder of L'Abri Fellowship in Switzerland, will recognize that as the title of one of his writings. Expessed another way: What should we do now?
One is inclined to think back to the 1950's when evangelist Billy Graham was so forcefully opposing communism in the days of the "Cold War."His message was that the communist theory of "Change society and you will change men," was diametrically in error -- the Christian standpoint is "Change the hearts of men, and they will in turn change society."
And that is the challenge facing conservative Evangelical Christians in America and throughout the world. Harry Jackson, Jr., Chairman of the High Impact Leadership Coalition, expressed the need well in his personal affirmation: "This is not a time for true conservatives to hang their heads or to run for cover. This is a time for a moral, political, and spiritual renewal to grip the very heart of the nation. My prayer is that this revolution will begin with me personally. I want to be the model Christian, conservative, and values voter that I want to see populate America." Mr. Jackson concluded with this quotation, traditionally ascribed to St. Francis of Assisi, "Preach the gospel at all times; if necessary use words.”
What Mr. Jackson is advocating is a return to Christians' obedience to the directive Jesus gave us in the last words of His earthly ministry -- familiarly known as the "Great Commission" -- recorded for us in Matthew 28 and Mark 16: "Go ye therefore into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature . . . teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost, teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you." What we must do is recommit ourselves to the Gospel message and make our presence known in the world around us by our obedience to the words of Jesus.
The secular forces, the liberals, the anti-God and anti-Christian forces, know they cannot prevail in the face of a united Christian army of believers. No matter how difficult our task may become, no matter how many temporary setbacks we may experience -- as in this recent election -- we must never yield to the temptation to quit and to give up. As He spoke His Great Commission, Jesus added this promise, "Lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world."
Quote for the day. At the 1999 Reclaiming America for Christ Conference in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, Dr. Laurence White gave a chaallenging illustration of why God's people must never stay out of politics. "The Christians of Germany learned only too late that God's people in Christ cannot disengage from the culture in which they live. They retreated into the comfortable security of their sanctuaries, they sat in their padded pews, they kept their religion and their politics strictly separate from one another, and their nation was destroyed. That retreat was encouraged and facilitated by the endlessly repeated lie of the absolute separation of church and state."
1863: Lincoln Declared Thanksgiving Day an Annual Holiday
President Abraham Lincoln declared the last Thursday in November as the annual national holiday, Thanksgiving Day. The tradition of Thanksgiving began in the fall of 1621 when William Bradford, a Christian and governor of Plymouth, invited the neighboring Wampanoag to join the Pilgrims for a festival celebrating the bounty of the season.