A boat overturns in shark infested waters. Some are consumed right away by hungry sharks Curiously a few are left without being harmed. As they swim to shore the one onlooker asks another Why some survived and others didn't. The answer is very simple, the survivors are lawyers. The sharks let them pass because of professional courtesy
What did the post card from the UNC student say?
"Having a good time. Where am I?"
Notice: If you see a UNC student or a liberal reading 'Thought & Humor', please explain to them which is thought & which is humor. They always get it backwards.......
Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
Death to all fanatics!
An oral contract isn't worth the paper its written on.
If we do not succeed, we run the risk of failure.
I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous!
Grammar has gots to be one of the most importantest things ever?
I am becoming increasingly worried that there isn't enough anxiety in my life.
I have this nagging fear that everyone is out to make me paranoid.
Life is full of uncertainties...or I could be wrong about that?
Not only am I redundant and superfluous, but I also tend to use more words than necessary.
Always remember you're unique...just like everyone else!
AMERICA ARCHIVED http://www.archives.gov/ This government site offers access to historic documents. View the Declaration of Independence and the Bill of Rights.
PHONESIA (fo nee' zhuh) n. The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.
TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay' shun) n. The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're six inches away.
If you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. --Romans 10
ECNALUBMA (ek na lub' ma) n. A rescue vehicle which can only be seen in the rear-view mirror.
A one-dollar bill met a twenty-dollar bill and said, "Hey, where have you been? I haven't seen you around here much."
The twenty answered, "I've been hanging out at the casinos, went on a cruise and did the rounds of the ship, back to the United States for a while, went to a couple of baseball games, to the mall, that kind of stuff. How about you?"
The one dollar bill said, "You know, same old stuff - church, church, church."