1) I have eyes but I see nothing. I have ears, but I hear nothing. I have a mouth, but cannot speak. I always will look just as I look now. If I am young, I will stay young. If I am old, I will remain old. What Am I?
2) Name at least 10 parts of the human body that are only 3 letters long. You cannot use slang.
3) Late afternoons I often bathe. I'll soak in water piping hot. My essence goes through my see through clothes. Used up am I; I've gone to pot.
*Answers are in "comments"
Comment & Forward>>>
Comments:
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Someone took this picture of Howdy today...
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Take the best medicine of all for what ails you -- laughter: "Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects." --Arnold Glasow "Laughter is by definition healthy." --Doris Lessing "If somebody makes me laugh, I'm his slave for life." --Bette Midler The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter." --Mark Twain "What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul." -- Yiddish Proverb "Laughter is an instant vacation." -- Milton Berle "Laughter is the shortest distance between two people." -- Victor Borge
NOTICE: The jokes published in this list were either submitted directly to 'Thought & Humor' or are, we believe, in the public domain. If you think that we have published a joke without giving proper credit to its author/owner, please let us know and we will provide appropriate credit in a future mailing.
ANSWERS: 1) A painting or photograph of someone. 2) Ear, eye, lip, jaw, toe, leg, arm, gum, hip & rib 3) A Tea Bag
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1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Methodist, etc.) have sinned & fall short of the glory of God.
2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (Free & at No Charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ (God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of Peace & Savior).
3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Methodist, etc.) that He even gave up His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone, anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in, relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven).
4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE. No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic, Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist, Brazilian, Methodist, etc. ) comes (arrives) to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through) ME (no other name).
This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - - (Rev. 3:20)
{Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian however they are great afterwards!!!}
Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment), and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness, forever with God), and only a few find it. --Matthew 7:13-14