Dr. Willis finished examining Matilda and went into the hallway to talk to her husband Bernie.
"I don't want to alarm you," he said to Bernie, "but I don't like the way your wife looks at all."
"Me neither, Doc." replied Bernie. "But she's a great cook and real good with the kids."
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THE TRUTH ABOUT INVESTMENTSSTOCK:
A magical piece of paper that is worth $33.75 until the momentyou buy it. It will then be worth $8.50. BOND: What you had with your spouse until you pawned his/her golf clubsto invest in Amazon.com. BROKER: The person you trust to help you make major financial decisions.Please note the first five letters of this word spell "Broke". BEAR: What your trade account and wallet will be when you take a flyeron that hot stock tip your secretary gave you. BULL: What your broker uses to explain why your mutual funds tankedduring the last quarter. MARGIN: Where you scribble the latest quotes when you're supposed to belistening to your manager's presentation.
Q. What's the difference between a bagpipe and an onion? A. No one cries when you chop up a bagpipe.
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Stressing the importance of a large vocabulary, the UNC English professor told his class, "Use a word ten times and it will be yours for life."
In the back of the room a pert sophomore closed her eyes and was heard chanting under her breath: "Fred, Fred, Fred, Fred, Fred, Fred, Fred, Fred, Fred, Fred."
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*Known as the Queen Of The Skies, the Boeing 747 has been in commercial service since 1970. It was the first wide-body long-haul jet, and it is still a mainstay of intercontinental passenger travel.
A fully loaded 747 weighs more than 400 tons (of which 40% is fuel), and its four engines deliver about 280 million watts of power for a thrust of about 1,100,000 Newtons (250,000 pounds). On intercontinental flights it can travel for more than 12 hours nonstop.
Originally, the 747 was intended for cargo flights, but when supersonic planes never caught on, the 747 became the world's favorite long-haul jet. A 747-400 (the latest model, which has small winglets at the wing tips) can carry as many as 524 people across the planet at almost 90% of the speed of sound.