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Wednesday

 


Q. What's the difference between a bagpipe and an onion?
A. No one cries when you chop up a bagpipe.





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(Not amalgamated with 'Thought & Humor')



==================



While attending a marriage seminar on communication,
David and his wife listened to the instructor declare,
"It is essential that husbands and wives know the things
that are important to each other."

He addressed the man, "Can you describe your wife's
favorite flower?"

David leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and
whispered, "Pillsbury All-Purpose, isn't it?"



==================

"How to Be Sure You're
a REAL Christian"
1-888-NEED-HIM
(24/7 - free call)

==================



The other day I needed to call home, but the only pay phone I could
find was in use...

So I stood to the side and politely waited until it was free, thinking
it would only be a couple of minutes. Five minutes went by, and still
the man was on the phone.

I noticed he was just standing there, not saying a word. Four more
minutes went by, and he still wasn't saying anything...

Finally, I tapped him on the shoulder and asked if I could use the
phone; just for minute... I really wouldn't be long, but needed to
make an important call.

"Just hold on, buddy!" he responded, covering the receiver. "I'm
talking to my wife."



==================



"Good, the more, communicated, more abundant grows."

ANSWER: John Milton (1608 - 1674), English author
  .comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
  .comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}
Dear Howdy,

Kindly get this stuff off my computer. I can manage my own spiritual life without your help and my sense of humor is just fine, thank you.

Jeanne - WVU
  .comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}
One of the reasons for the success of the internet is its open,
peer-to-peer nature. All computers on the internet are equal,
and in the past it hasn't mattered whether your computer is
a 386 in Nguru on the end of a satellite phone or a big monster
in a New York rack. If that ever changes, I think we will lose
part of the essential, vital character of the internet. Doug Winter


==================


Actor Mel Gibson on what women want .....
"After about twenty years of marriage, I'm finally starting to
scratch the surface of that one. And I think the answer lies
somewhere between conversation and chocolate."


==================



People say that hard work never killed anybody,
but did you ever know anybody who rested to death?


==================



Cats and Dogs

DOG -- These people give me food, clean water, a bed, a house to live in
and unconditional love, they must be really special.

CAT -- These people give me food, clean water, a bed, a house to live in
and unconditional love, I must be really special.



==================



Q. What does it mean when all the socks in the laundry
match, with none left over?
A. You're now losing them in pairs!


==================



Two UNC girls were talking to each other
and one couldn't help but notice how pretty
and beautiful the others skin was. So she
asked her outright what made her skin so
soft and beautiful.
"Well.. once a week I fill a bathtub up
with milk and just soak in it."

So the UNC student went to a farm and spoke to
the farmer. "I'd like a lot of milk."

"How much?" asked the farmer.

"Well quite a lot because I'm going to soak in it."

He asked, "Pasturized?" "No...just up to my neck."



==================


In his book, Renovation of the Heart, Dallas Willard observed, "Feelings
make excellent servants, but terrible masters." In our culture, many
slogans tell us our feelings should dictate how to live. If we feel
bitter against another, we should allow that bitterness to burn. If we
feel unimportant, we should run to music or substances to console the
feelings. Feelings tell us where to go, what to say, and what to do.

Many addictive vices are more a matter of feelings than a matter of
chemicals: compulsive shopping, pornography, alcohol, narcotics, gambling,
gossip, selfishness, needing to be needed, wealth, video games, bossy
behavior, and other vices that stem from feelings of fear and
worthlessness. But vices are unable, by their very nature, to satisfy.
Vices easily become things we habitually run to because they help us
appease the enthroned dictator of our feelings.

But it isn't just the feelings of individuals. The feelings of society
can also be masters. What about racism? When feelings become masters,
people of all races feel the blow.

I was speaking with someone recently about society's feelings. She said,
"Why can't we explain justice as a concept society created?" I asked her
if she thought racism was wrong. "Yes," she said. I asked her if society
thought it was wrong one hundred years ago. "No." I asked her if Martin
Luther King was a good guy. "Yes." I asked her if Martin Luther King
learned that racism was wrong from his society. "No." Then with an
expression of discovery, she said, "Oh, I see. Well, it does seem that
people do know what justice is in the back of their minds, even if they
ignore it."

Feelings make terrible masters. But feelings make excellent servants. In
the life of David, the young man is pursued by the envious King Saul who
is trying to kill him. David cries out to God to be delivered from
cruelty and injustice. Then with God's ironic timing, Saul steps
vulnerably into a cave for a moment. David huddles in the shadows of that
cave, remembering his prayers. How does David feel? Alone, unimportant,
afraid, rejected. Though all of his feelings were real and justified,
David allowed them to be servants. And they drove him to God.

David showed mercy when his feelings wanted to lead him to vengeance. He
declared, "I will not lift my hand against my master, because he is the
Lord's anointed." (Footnote 1: 1 Samuel 24:10) You see, David was a man
who developed a habit of seeking after God and was more concerned about
God's kingdom than his own. He directed his feelings of loneliness, fear,
and rejection to point him to a proper place. If his feelings were
masters, David may have pitifully altered the rest of his life. But by
making feelings his servants, David responded well.

Have feelings controlled your actions today? Have you allowed your
feelings to dictate poor lifestyle habits? Look at them with scrutiny.
Why are they there? What do they mean? Let me encourage you to direct
your feelings to point you to God. Be deliberate to develop a wise mind
that habitually seeks after God and chooses what is good. Then we may say
with David, "I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from
all my fears…The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who
are crushed in spirit." (Footnote 2: Psalm 34:4, 18) Dale Fincher

To subscribe, send blank e-mail with the subject 'Subscribe':
slice-subscribe@lists.gospelcom.net
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Hear about the UNC student who.............................?

* Can't make KoolAid because eight cups of water won't fit into
one of those little packets...........?

* Got hurt when she fell out of the tree while raking leaves...........?

* Two UNC stucents are trying to get into their car using a coat
hanger when one says, "Hurry, it's starting to rain, and the top is
down."..........?


==================




Two lawyers are in a bank, when armed robbers burst in. While several
of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line the
customers, including the lawyers, up against a wall, and proceed to
take their wallets, watches, etc.

While this is going on, the first lawyer jams something in the other
lawyer's hand. Without looking down, the second lawyer whispers, the
the first, "What is this?"

The first lawyer replies, "it's that $50 I owe you."



==================

Trust in yourself and you are doomed to disappointment;
trust in money and you may have it taken from you;
but trust in God, and you are never to be confounded in
time or eternity. - D.L. Moody

==================


Who is Jesus? (http://www.ccci.org/whoisjesus/interactive-journey/)



===============


One day at a trial, an eminent UNC staff psychologist was called to testify.
A severe no nonsense professional, she sat down in the witness chair
unaware that it's rear legs were set precariously on the back of the
raised platform.

"Will you state your name?" asked the district attorney.

Tilting back in her chair she opened her mouth to answer, but instead
catapulted head-over-heels backward and landed in a stack of exhibits
and recording equipment.

Everyone watched in stunned silence as she extricated herself,
rearranged her disheveled dress and hair and was reseated on the witness
stand. The glare she directed at onlookers dared anyone to so much as
smirk.

"Well, doctor," continued the district attorney without changing
expression, "we could start with an easier question."
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February 2006   March 2006   April 2006   May 2006   June 2006   July 2006   August 2006   September 2006   October 2006   November 2006   December 2006   December 2007  


How Can I Know God???

Tales of Narnia

Answering Islam

The Da Vinci Code

A Short Look At Six World Religions

Bible - God's Word in different languages...

My Heart Christ's Home

Big John's America

Not Garbage

Discovery Institute

See The Word

Bible Study Info

Don't Be Left Behind

For The University Students & Faculty

How to become a Christian

The Berean Call

Great For Kids

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Promoting Your Own Blog

Looking For God

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Who Is Jesus???

Christian Apologetics

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Great Christians In History

History of American Christianity

Bible Instructions

RBC

Dr. Ben Haden

Bible Search Tools

Kids For Truth

Lincoln - A Christian

Mission To America

One Place For Learning

President Lincoln

Purgatory, Heaven Or Hell?

Intellectual Takeout

Evangelical Viewpoint

Dr. John Vernon McGee

Insight For Living

Turning Point

Outstanding Bible Teacher

Dr. Tony Evans

Listen To The Bible

Is Jesus God?

Games

Great Bible Teaching

America - Why I Love Her

How To Become A Christian

*Watch The Jesus Movie*

Fireworks

Your very own library

Muhammad or Jesus???

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 1

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 2

Christian Women

Politics & Religion

Is Jesus God?

Statement Of What Howdy Believes!!!

Bible Crosswords

Los Angeles

Bible Search Tool

Great Bible Teacher

All About Cults

Religion Comparison

The Relationship of the Church to Israel

Just For Guys

Church History

***Watch The Jesus Movie***
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Howdy's Blog #2

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Music That Howdy Enjoys



Military Music

Blueberry Hill

Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring

JOHANN SEBASTIAN BACH)

A Taste Of Honey - clip

(I Left My Heart) In San Francisco - clip

Take The 'A' Train - clip

Hello, Dolly! - clip

Peggy Sue - clip

Theme From Peter Gunn - clip

Song from Moulin Rouge

Malagueña

Ebb Tide

Tara's Theme from Gone with the Wind

Around the World in 80 Days

Breakfast at Tiffany's

Charade

The Way We Were

You Do Something to Me

SWonderful

Adios

A Foggy Day

Amor

Anna

Arrivederci Roma

Theme from Moulin Rouge II

Stardust - Big Band

Bolero

Brazil

Rhapsody in Blue

Sleepy Lagoon

My Foolish Heart

Lisbon Antigua

La Mer

April in Portugal

Because of You

Poor People of Paris

Unchained Melody

Stranger on the Shore

Solace

Maple Leaf Rag

Voices of Spring

Radetzky March

Water Music (Excerpt) George Frideric Handel

Finale - William Tell Overture

Overture - My Fair Lady

The Rain in Spain

The Lonely Bull - Herb Alpert

Tijuana Taxi - Herb Alpert

The Happy Whistler

So Rare

Mona Lisa

Ghost Riders in the Sky

Walk, Don't Run

Wonderland by Night

Canadian Sunset

Blue Tango

The Happy Wanderer

Down Yonder

Midnight in Moscow

Crazy Medley

Tequila

That's for Me

Quiet Village

Harbor Lights

Dueling Banjoes II

Autumn Leaves

My Foolish Heart

Don't Know Much

I WALK THE LINE

EL PASO

TENNESSEE WALTZ

STAND BY YOUR MAN

Close To You

Rainy Days & Mondays

Sing A Song

Yesterday Once More

We've Only Just Begun

Goodbye To Love

Only You

As Time Goes By

As Time Goes By II

As Time Goes By - Original

After Loving

San Francisco

Stranger In Paradise

Mrs. Howdy

Rags To Riches

The Good Life

Hello Dolly

All Of Me

Thank Heaven For Little Girls

Beyond The Sea

Everybody Loves

Return To Me

That's Amore

Autumn Leaves

Love Me With All Your Heart

If I Give My Heart To You

Autumn Leaves II

Autumn Leaves III

See The USA

My Prayer

You Always Hurt

Take Me Out To The Ballgame

Love Me Tender

Its Now Or Never

Old Shep

Dont Be Cruel

When I Fall In Love

When I Fall In Love II

When I Fall In Love III

A Fool Such As I

You'll Never Know

Fascination

I'm Yours

Wish You Were Here

Lady Of Spain

CanadianSunset

It's Magic

Secret Love

This Magic Moment

My Prayer

Twilight Time

Great Pretender

Harbor Lights

Little Darlin'

Wanted

No Other Love

Magic Moments

Till The End Of Time

Dont Let The Stars

Overture - Barber of Seville

Back In The Saddle

You Always Hurt

When I Fall

When A Man

True Love

Sincerely

Sweetheart

In The Mood

A Taste Of Honey

The Lonely Bull

Lollipops And Roses

This Guys In Love With You

What Now My Love

Three Coins In The Fountain

You've Gotta Have Heart

HeartOfMyHeart

Stranger In Paradise II

Love Is...

Unforgettable

Georgia On My Mind

Sentimental Over You

Thanks For The Memories

Too Young

Because

Never On Sunday

Yellow Rose Of Texas

Windy

My Little Corner

Speak Low

Moments To Remember

HernandosHideaway

Be My Love

Embassy Waltz

Misty

A Certain Smile

Chances Are

Not For Me To Say

Stranger On The Shore

I'll Be Seeing You

Cherry Pink

Downtown

Moonlight Serenade

Last Date

Naughty Lady

Til I Kissed You

All I Have To Do Is Dream

Dixie Land Band

Ghost Riders In The Sky

The Happy Wanderer

Lollipops

Santa Catalina

Band Of Gold

Auld Lang Syne

The Wayward Wind

P.S. I Love You

Harbor Lights

Ebb Tide

Lime Light

Green Door

My Heart Cries

Down Yonder

Silvana Mangano Anna

Does Your Chewing Gum?

Grand Night For Singing

Purple People Eater

Orange Blossom Special

I'll Get By

'Til Then

Katie At UNC

Love Letters

As Time Goes By

Cheek To Cheek

Mission Impossible

The Way You Look Tonight

Frenesi

Glad To Be An American

Battle Hymn Of The Republic

How Great Thou Art

Have Thine Own Way

Beyond The Sunset

Amazing Grace

He's Got The Whole World

Peace In The Valley

How Great Thou Art II

Stars & Stripes Forever

Tennessee Waltz

Beverly Hillbillies Theme

El Paso

Happy Trails

Big John

Sixteen Tons

Which Doctor?

Wonderful! Wonderful!

Misty

Gina

Colombo

Daniel Boone

Davy Crockett

Dick VanDyke

Donna Reed

Father Knows Best

Gilligan

Gomer Pile

Gunsmoke

Have Gun

Hawaii Five-O

Hogans Heroes

Do.Not.Forsake.Me

MyPrayer

Hopalong

Howdy

Lucy

Lassie

Law & Order

Lone Ranger

Magnificent 7

Magnum

Man From Uncle

Dobie

Maverick

Mickey

Mission I

Mr. Ed

My 3 Sons

Raw Hide

Real McCoys

Rifle Man

Secret Agent

Simon & Simon

Smothers

Spencer

StarTrek

Super Man

ThatGirl

Tonight

T-Zone

Untouchable

WagonTrain

Walton

WildWest

77

Ozzie

Andy

Beverly

Bonanza

Car.5.4

Victory I

NKC-Perfidia

The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Mr. Sandman

Only The Lonely

Beyond The Sea

Pachelbel

Magnificent 7

Magnificent 7 - II

Rawhide

I Walk The Line




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* * * Four Important Things To KNOW: #1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned & fall short of the glory of God. #2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ (God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of Peace & Savior of the World). #3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone, anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in, relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven). #4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE. No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic, Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist, Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives) to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through) ME (no other name). *** This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - - (Rev. 3:20) {Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian - however they are great afterwards!!!} *** Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment), and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness, forever with God), and only a few find it.


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P U R P O S E
But these are written so that you may
believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the
Son of God, and that by believing in
Him you will have life. Jn 20:31

Seek the Lord while He may be found;
call on Him while He is near. Let the
wicked forsake his way and the evil
man his thoughts. Let him turn to the
Lord, and He will have mercy on him,
and to our God, for He will freely
pardon. "For My thoughts are not
your thoughts, neither are your ways
My ways," declares the Lord. "As the
heavens are higher than the earth, so
are My ways higher than your ways
and My thoughts than your thoughts.
As the rain and the snow come down
from heaven, and do not return to it
without watering the earth and making
it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed
for the sower and bread for the eater,
so is My word that goes out from My
mouth: It will not return to Me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire and
achieve the purpose for which I sent it.
You will go out in joy and be led forth
in peace; the mountains and hills will
burst into song before you, and all the
trees of the field will clap their hands.
Instead of the thornbush will grow the
pine tree, and instead of briers the myrtle
will grow. This will be for the Lord's
renown, for an everlasting sign, which
will not be destroyed." Is 55

O Lord, you have searched me and you
know me. You know when I sit and when
I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying
down; you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue you know
it completely, O Lord. You hem me in -
behind and before; you have laid your
hand upon me. Such knowledge is too
wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where
can I flee from your presence? If I go up
to the heavens, you are there; if I make
my bed in the depths, you are there.

If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide
me and the light become night around
me," even the darkness will not be dark
to you; the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you. For you
created my inmost being; you knit me
together in my mother's womb. I praise
you because I am fearfully and wonderfully
made; your works are wonderful, I know
that full well. My frame was not hidden
from you when I was made in the secret
place. When I was woven together in the
depths of the earth, your eyes saw my
unformed body. All the days ordained
for me were written in your book before
one of them came to be.

How precious to me are your thoughts,
O God! How vast is the sum of them!
Were I to count them, they would
outnumber the grains of sand. When
I awake, I am still with you. Search me,
O God, and know my heart; test me
and know my anxious thoughts. See
if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Ps 139

But indeed for this purpose I have raised you up,
that I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth. Ex 9:16


When I survey the wondrous cross
On which the Prince of Glory died,
My richest gain I count but loss,
And pour contempt on all my pride.

Were the whole realm of nature mine,
That were a present far too small:
Love so amazing, so divine,
Demands my soul, my life, my all.
- - Isaac Watts


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